Earlier in the week I perplexed my sister when she asked why so many of the movies that I love are so sad, and I told her that watching an excellent movie, no matter how sad, actually makes me happy. And conversely, watching a poorly made but “feel-good” movie often just makes me feel sad. She didn’t quite understand, but of course, I don’t claim to be normal.

That said, if you are in the market for a not-badly made and not-entirely sad movie, we found a little gem this week in The Ramen Girl. Very sweet, great characters, lots of food – we all loved it.

But back to the topic at hand…

This weekend I watched first A Single Man, and then Creation. On the surface these two films don’t have much in common at all, but after watching both of them, I have to say that they are far more similar than you would think. The only striking difference is that one film is far better than the other.

Both of the films deal with grief. In A Single Man, George (Colin Firth) grieves the loss of his partner, and in Creation, Charles Darwin (Paul Bettany) grieves the loss of his daughter. Both films treat time in a slightly non-linear fashion: set in a period sometime after the deaths of their loved ones, we are nonetheless treated to extended flashbacks and scenes which detail the depth of their relationship (and thus, the chasm of their absence).

In each film, the death is the catalyst for some kind of tension. George has been with Jim for over 16 years, and yet after Jim’s death, George is not welcome at the funeral. Just as their relationship was concealed (or outright ignored), so George must also hide his grief. And it gnaws away at him, for every waking moment is a reminder of what he does not have and cannot admit to wanting.

For the Darwins, the death of their oldest daughter drives a wedge between them. Charles no longer finds comfort in the faith to which his wife clings. She sees where his work is going, watches his faith slip away, and fears that they will find themselves separated for all eternity. But for Charles, it’s not so much about the faith as it is about the truth. Just as she cannot understand his persistence, he cannot understand any argument which would deny what he has irrefutably witnessed.

And while they both deal with these hugely controversial issues (homosexuality and evolution), neither film is an activist’s piece. That George and Jim love each other in a society that does not accept their relationship only compounds the sense of loss, but A Single Man really is about loss, first and foremost, and it is a deeply moving film. I imagine it’s first-time director Tom Ford’s experience in the fashion industry that gives him this incredible sense for aesthetics. He may perhaps rely too much on detail shots and long, dreamy sequences, but everything about the set design and costuming is meticulously perfect, and his use of color is inspired. Colin Firth absolutely deserved the Golden Globe, and the Oscar nomination. He is amazing in this movie.

Meanwhile, Creation does such a good job of avoiding controversy that most of the life is sucked right out of the film. The only real moment of discord is when Thomas Huxley declares that Darwin has “killed God” and proceeds to make a rather over-exaggerated speech about science reigning victorious over religion. Darwin, for his part, looks duly horrified. Rarely have I watched a film about a historical figure and thought that a documentary would be more interesting. A commenter on Roger Ebert’s blog characterized the film as “another deathly serious melodrama about the life of a famous person struck by tragedy, and only [glosses] over the controversial issues that are actually relevant and interesting”. What we have here is not so much a film about Charles Darwin’s life or his work, but a film about a man coming to terms with loss.

And if you want to see that, just watch A Single Man.