This is really Peanut’s last night with us.

I fed Rex a few minutes ago, and he didn’t come over to eat right away, instead staying by Peanut and washing her face. I do believe that he knows how frail she is. I just wonder how he’ll feel tomorrow.

Peanut today:

We’ll be bringing Peanut in tomorrow. It seems so sudden: Tuesday we found out she was ill and Friday she’ll be gone. Yet not once have I doubted that this is the right decision. I am a person of deep faith, and I believe that the overwhelming peace and assurance I have felt can only be from God.

My family has been AMAZING. Dad and Stephen built a little wooden box today, Hannah decorated it, and Mom is just being all-around supportive. I told Mom today, “It’s sad, but it’s not devastating.”

The spirit of the bunny that I have loved for so many years is now bound by a tired and broken body. It’s time to set Peanut free.

I woke up twice early this morning to Peanut rolling around wildly. I think maybe her inner ear is causing some vertigo. It took me several minutes to calm her down each time.

I’m hoping and praying that she makes it through today; I’m gone during the day at school, and my younger brother is gone tonight. Tomorrow we’ll all be home together.

I’ve decided not to bring Rex to the vet’s with us. As much as I hate to seperate them at the end, he gets very, very stressed by car rides and having him there when Peanut is put to sleep could be harder on him than it needs to be. We will be bringing her body back with us and allow him to have time with her. I’ve asked my brother and dad to build a small box and I’m still trying to decide what we should include in it.

Thanks everyone.

On GCM, a member with experience in hospice care said that patients will frequently experience several good days right before the end. I think that’s what Peanut’s recovery signified.

Her condition is fairly rapidly declining. She is weak and she is tired. Her appetite is there, but it’s waning. And the hardest part is knowing that a natural death would be prolonged and painful. She does not have the option of simply letting go before it gets bad. That weight lies soley upon myself as her human – the hardest decision a pet mommy or daddy will ever have to make.

It will likely be tomorrow or Friday, depending on her condition. When I spoke with the vet today she said that we could bring her the moment we felt it was time. I told the vet that I felt completely at peace with this path, and I do. It hurts a lot but all doubts have gone. And that peace has enabled me to think ahead, to make arrangements, and to spend as much meaningful time with her as I can.