the domestic zoo

First off, I stink at being dairy-free. It’s enough to make a person want to quit, except for in my case, quitting would make me feel even worse. Logically, I know I need to give up dairy if I want to feel better, but I really don’t have the energy for it. Could be the weather, could be schoolwork, or it could be, what’s that word again? Oh…laziness.

And while we’re on the subject of laziness, I’ve realized that it’s been awhile since I posted about my journey to Orthodoxy. I guess that’s because I still have a hard time putting it all into words. Pretty incredible for someone so verbose, but the entire experience defies adequate explanation. I am immersing myself slowly, going to Liturgy every week, and to the Discovering Orthodoxy classes on Tuesday nights. I’ve read some, but not too much, focusing more on prayer and simple Scripture reading.

The mindset change is what’s so profound to me at the moment. I don’t think about the faith as I used to, or – as I’ve come to realize – most of my friends still do. Not that it’s necessarily a bad thing, it’s just different. I’ve stopped going to my old (non-denom) church. It wasn’t nearly as hard as I thought it would be, though I’m not sure if that means anything.

We’re in the Nativity Fast now, though “we” does not include “me”. If you have any questions about my self-control, recall my struggle with giving up dairy. I have decided that there is one area in my life that I definitely need to gain control over, and that is my love of conflict. Not so much outright fighting, but more heated debates, especially in the internet arena. I realize that I don’t like to argue, but at the same time, I love to argue. I hate what it does to my spirit, but I relish the challenge.

So I’ve stayed out of most debates as of late, and have gone so far as to avoid entirely certain sites, blogs, etc. that provoke this uncharitable side of myself. I don’t say this to pat myself on the back. I say this to keep myself accountable.

One thing that I refuse to let bother me is, as Bill O’Reilly has termed it, “The Battle for Christmas”. Honestly, it’s not something I’d really even think about, but it seems to be everywhere, from online communities to my own living room. If it’s a fight you feel called to be a part of, so be it. Just don’t expect me to care whether or not someone says “Merry Christmas” or “Happy Holiday-of-Choice”. I’m just happy that at least one radio station will be playing holiday music 24/7, right up until the 26th (did I not say I was a mushball?)

And on a completely unrelated note, tomorrow is World AIDs Day. I’m already wearing my red ribbon. Today in Biology class, my professor gave us a detailed explanation of how retroviruses (specifically, HIV) work. It’s scary stuff, and listening to just how the disease infects and spreads throughout the human body made me feel ill. I just couldn’t get those faces from Mother Theresa’s mission out of my head, and I don’t think I’ve acknowledged how much that experience affected me until quite recently. Writing about it helped. But it’s hard not to feel grieved and powerless when faced with such a widespread pandemic.

Lord, be with us, for in times of distress we have no other help but You.
Lord, have mercy on us.

Rex loves it.

The other morning, I was serving them their salad; the veggies are mixed together on a paper plate, dumped into the rabbits’ dish, and then the plate is typically used to divvy out the cats’ food. Well, on this particular morning the rabbits were very demanding at breakfast time, and I ended up tossing the plate in their with the salad still on it (I was in a rush, I’m not normally such a lazy mom)

Well, for the rest of the day, Rex played with the plate. He slept on the plate. He carted the plate around the cage with him. He put his front paws on it and slid it around the cage. And when the day was done, he ripped it into little pieces.

A new toy that’s fun and cheap – what could be better?

I’ll admit to being hopelessly sentimental when it comes to the holidays. Falling snow and Nat King Cole crooning “O Come, All Ye Faithful” turns me into a complete and total mushball.

Not that I’m a fan of winter, mind you – I hate the cold, and the dark, and the endless months of shovelling and scraping. But there’s something about the Christmas season that makes even this abominable New England weather somewhat more tolerable.

(and of course, by the time we ring in the New Year I am more than ready for the sun to come back)

But for the next 28 days, 6 hours, and 30 minutes, I will soak up every ounce of the holiday spirit. There are movies to watch, decorations to hang, cookies to bake, trees to light, and gifts to wrap.

It’s the most wonderful time of the year
There’ll be much mistltoeing,
And hearts will be glowing
When love ones are near .
It’s the most wonderful time of the year!

“Moral relativism and logic have never walked hand in hand down lovers’ lane. They may have made eye contact in the grocery store once.”

posted by arielle on vox popoli

(11.25.05 – link to comment)